There is no reliable account of sex in space, or even in simulated zero-G.

Here’s what we do know:

A claimed NASA document about the best sexual positions in space is an easily proved hoax.
Several astronauts have given reliable first-hand accounts of erections in space.
Several astronauts have claimed that manual masturbation occurs in space, but none have ever owned up to doing it themselves.
A single first-hand account of case of sexual harassment in space involving french kissing terminated the mission
Two astronauts secretly tied the knot just before a space mission, but are keeping completely quiet about what happened later
In a Russian experiment, male and female rats were put together for the duration of a space mission, no pregnancies ensued
ditto, some pregnant rats were taken up before being brought down for a birth that preceded normally
Bull sperm swam normally in space in a NASA experiment
A “Girls gone wild” video was made in a Russian “vomit comet” but that just had jiggling breasts
Playboy has tried many times and failed to obtain a zero-G flight
A porn film starring a Czech actress hired a private jet pilot to do a zero-G parabola, but the zero-G sex in the film was all faked
There is no record of people having sex underwater away from ground surfaces
A couple has been filmed having sex while skydiving, but that’s not a good imitation of zero-G
The Bigelow space hotel advertises the possibility of zero-G sex, but that hasn’t happened yet
Sex has been studied in dolphins, but that’s not reliable because the dolphin penis is prehensile, and there are rumours about female dolphin abilities as well.
Sex has not been observed in wild harbour seals at sea despite patient watching.

Opinions differ about whether sex in zero-G will be great or terrible. The loss of lower-body fluids due to upwards movement stopped some astronauts from having erections. The lack of things to push against could also hamper sex in zero-G. On the other hand, zex in zero-G could make the Karma Sutra obsolete.

“Food may be processed by many of the same techniques that are used to fabricate structures and shapes from plastic. Instead of abandoning the Lunar Module on the moon, Apollo 11 could have broken off pieces to take along and eat on the way home. Several companies were already spinning textiles from soybeans and milk proteins, so astronauts could also eat their dirty clothes. When one of the chemists said “what we could do is hydrolyse feces back to carbon and make patties out of it”, the astronauts in attendance went “We are not eating shit burgers on the way back”. So instead complete the cycle by making spacecraft parts out of processed feces, hydrocarbons make good shielding against cosmic radiation.”

—-

“Religious observances are tough in a real spacecraft. Buzz Aldrin packed a “tiny Host” and thimble-sized wind chalice for his DIY Communion on the moon. Zero gravity and a ninety minute orbital day created many questions for Muslim astronauts. A Muslim who began is prayer while facing Mecca was likely, by prayer’s end, to be mooning Mecca.”

> thimble-sized wind chalice for his DIY Communion on the moon

thimble-sized wine chalice for his DIY Communion on the moon

mollwollfumble said:

There is no record of people having sex underwater away from ground surfaces

I haven’t been in space, but have had sex underwater, while scuba diving. It was planned, and we weren’t wearing wetsuits (I’ve read of someone who was suffering from nitrogen narcosis thinking he was about to have sex with a mermaid (how?) and taking his wetsuit off under 30m of water – an astonishingly difficult feat), but it was awkward, and we didn’t really have anything to push against. Neither of us really enjoyed it, and neither reached climax; we just did it to see if it could be done.

Note that “in space” doesn’t equate to “zero gee”.

dv said:

Note that “in space” doesn’t equate to “zero gee”.

sex with zero gee is kind of pointless

Thanks Wocky.

Looks like there is gaping hole in space exploration. You’d think there would be a race on to fill it.

“Some women, Commander Norton had decided long ago, should not be allowed aboard ship; weightlessness did things to their breasts that were too damn distracting. It was bad enough when they were motionless; but when they started to move, and sympathetic vibrations set in, it was more than any warm-blooded male should be asked to take. He was quite sure that at least one serious space accident had been caused by acute crew distraction, after the transit of a well upholstered lady officer through the control cabin.”

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sex_in_space

I have heard female astronauts are supposed to tape their breasts, but it’s more of a comfort thing.

have any of those tapes been upload to the web?

• have any of those tapes been upload to the web?

*golf clap*

JudgeMental said:

have any of those tapes been upload to the web?

furious said:

• have any of those tapes been upload to the web?

*golf clap*

diddly-squat said:

JudgeMental said:

have any of those tapes been upload to the web?

The Raquel Welch school of astronaut attire.

Ian said:

Looks like there is gaping hole in space exploration. You’d think there would be a race on to fill it.

“Some women, Commander Norton had decided long ago, should not be allowed aboard ship; weightlessness did things to their breasts that were too damn distracting. It was bad enough when they were motionless; but when they started to move, and sympathetic vibrations set in, it was more than any warm-blooded male should be asked to take. He was quite sure that at least one serious space accident had been caused by acute crew distraction, after the transit of a well upholstered lady officer through the control cabin.”

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sex_in_space

Is that satire?

it is from a scifi story. can’t remember which one.

“It’s satire, Jim, but not as we know it.”

rendezvous with rama. after reading the link. knew i recognised it.

Arts said:

Ian said:

Looks like there is gaping hole in space exploration. You’d think there would be a race on to fill it.

“Some women, Commander Norton had decided long ago, should not be allowed aboard ship; weightlessness did things to their breasts that were too damn distracting. It was bad enough when they were motionless; but when they started to move, and sympathetic vibrations set in, it was more than any warm-blooded male should be asked to take. He was quite sure that at least one serious space accident had been caused by acute crew distraction, after the transit of a well upholstered lady officer through the control cabin.”

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sex_in_space

Is that satire?

Probably not.

Non gravity might effect conception in some way?

CrazyNeutrino said:

Non gravity might effect conception in some way?

You’d think not, but it’s not that clear-cut. Perhaps the downward motion of the egg through the fallopian tube and uterus relies in part on gravity. Further, there are suggestions that the hormonal balance is different in space.

Birth in space could be a bit difficult because it’s the downward weight of the baby’s head that induces labour. In addition, the muscles of the vagina tend to atrophy a bit along with other muscles in space. And bone loss would tend to result in a greater risk of bone fractures during childbirth.

diddly-squat said:

JudgeMental said:

have any of those tapes been upload to the web?

http://fun10s.us/uploads/eb163727917cbba1eea208541a643e74.gif

See also quote from book

Packing for Mars, zero gee