There are many big questions out there. Most have been asked at some time on this forum. A book I’m reading has serious answers to more than 100 of them.
This thread is your chance to supply funny answers to serious questions. For example:
Michaela Strachan
Why do elephants have trunks?
Because they would look silly with glove boxes.
Sarah Millican
Is it OK to eat a worm?
Only if your main isn’t watching.
Where does wind come from?
Brussels sprouts. And it wasn’t me.
Are we all related?
Is this you angling for a Christmas present?
How does my cat always find her way home?
Catnav.
Why do we sleep at night?
Wait till you go to university, you’ll be able to do it through the day too.
Do aliens exist?
Yes. They impersonate little brothers and sisters. So be careful.
Why do lions roar?
It’s a yawn, you must be quite boring.
How did Michelangelo get so famous?
He was the only Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle who could paint really well.
Do monkeys and chickens have anything in common?
Yes. They both taste delicious with chips.
How did they build the pyramids?
Out of loads and loads of Toblerones.
What is the internet for?
Before the internet, you had to talk to people, put kittens on pianos and push monkeys off logs yourself.
Sandi Toksvig
Why do people have different-coloured skin?
To make colour television more interesting.
Where does good’ come from?
A small factory in Taiwan.
Why are planets round?
To make them difficult to wrap.
Why is it dark at night?
To give torch manufacturers a sense of purpose.
Why do monkeys eat bananas?
Because they are a-peeling.
Why does the moon shine?
Beeswax applied once a month.
Why do we cook food?
To make having a kitchen in the house look less foolish.
What do you have to do to get into the Olympic Games?
Stop reading.
How do you make electricity?
By running in very tight nylon shorts.
What is gravity?
A drag.
Robert Webb
Who had the first ever pet?
The Roman Emperor Julius Caesar. It was a squirrel called Bianca.