Not long now.

rubs hands

Peak Warming Man said:

Not long now.

rubs hands

Is it on a radio or TV?

Did we win?

Peak Warming Man said:

Not long now.

rubs hands

cricket is, if i may be so bold as to say, a funny game.

roughbarked said:

Peak Warming Man said:

Not long now.

rubs hands

Is it on a radio or TV?

No, I’ll be getting updates via Telegram and the sailing ship with a full report of the first days play will be here in a week.

rubs hands

Bogsnorkler said:

Peak Warming Man said:

Not long now.

rubs hands

cricket is, if i may be so bold as to say, a funny game.

The losers rarely laugh.

India to be fined by ICC for producing ‘poor’ Pune pitch

India has been put on notice for the “poor” condition of the wicket and the BCCI is now under intense pressure not to prepare another rank turner for the rest of this series.

It’s an embarrassing turn of events for the BCCI, who have not only been exposed for their pitch doctoring ways, but have copped a taste of their own medicine.

India’s attempts to order a turning pitch in Pune backfired spectacularly, with Virat Kohli and their batsmen becoming victims of the BCCI’s own attempts to control conditions and undermine their opposition.
…..

…..

India take steel objects to Bangalore pitch for second Test after Pune minefield blew up in their faces

AUSTRALIA is bracing for a war of attrition in Bangalore after paranoid curators used a steel object, hessian bags, hoses and a mystery substance to try to take Mitchell Starc and Steve O’Keefe out of the second Test.

Embarrassed after the debacle in Pune, the BCCI appear hell bent on using any means necessary to manufacture conditions that will set up a brutal five-day battle in the hope it will favour the innate skills and home ground knowledge of the embattled Indians.

In contrast to the crumbly, dust bowl that disintegrated on the spot and played into Australia’s hands in the first Test, the Bangalore centre square looked more like a green monster, but not one that will offer bounce and carry. Instead, it’s a surface purposefully designed to try to silence reverse swing masters Starc and Josh Hazlewood.

Curators resorted to cloak and dagger methods on Wednesday, driving a steel object into the middle of the pitch and using a mystery substance to try and close up cracks, before hastily covering the wicket up to conceal it from view…

Daily Terror

…..

rofl

Wonder if it has crossed their minds to try batting, bowling and fielding better.

India won the toss and elected to bat.

FUCK OFF

FUCK OFF

Kohli fails again

3/91

“Live: India six down at tea with Aussies on top”

I’d check that if I were you Mr ABC

FUCK OFF

Peak Warming Man said:

“Live: India six down at tea with Aussies on top”

I’d check that if I were you Mr ABC

ABC has got the new predictive app installed already I see.

7/178…

Lyon’s got five for.

:)

FUCK OFF

sibeen said:

FUCK OFF

OK. Laterz.

Looks like it’s going to be another turner.
If India can get to 250 odd they’d still be in this game.

Peak Warming Man said:

Looks like it’s going to be another turner.
If India can get to 250 odd they’d still be in this game.

250 is an even number.

Looks like it’s going to be another turner.
If India can get to 249 odd they’d still be in this game.

who is this Off lady? I can’t say I know her.

6 now for Australia’s favourite Nathan.

party_pants said:

6 now for Australia’s favourite Nathan.

They are calling him GOAT on the ABC blog for some reason and posting a lot of gifs.

slinks in

FUCK OFF

slinks out

All Fucked Off 189

Lyon (henceforth Lion) 8/50

:)

8 now, and he is on a hat-trick first ball of the 2nd innings.

Merv Hughes did it over two innings and three overs. Now that takes some doing.

Ian said:

All Fucked Off 189

Lyon (henceforth Lion) 8/50

:)

Or GOAT (greatest of all time) ??

If Warner can last for 15 overs here we should be in front.

Renshaw is outscoring him at the moment.

sibeen said:

Renshaw is outscoring him at the moment.

OK, he’s not now.

knocks off bails

Stumps gentlemen.

knocks off bails

I’d call that a good day for the Ausiies.

Peak Warming Man said:

knocks off bails

Stumps gentlemen.

stands to applaud

great day for Aus!

Well done. Four hours to start of play on Day Two…

:)

Michael V said:

Well done. Four hours to start of play on Day Two…

:)

rubs hands

Day two has commenced.

rubs hands

sibeen said:

Day two has commenced.

rubs hands

Warner Renshaw, resume day two.

sibeen said:

Day two has commenced.

rubs hands

Have you got your swear jar ready?

FUCK

There’s a bit of feeling out there, good.

Peak Warming Man said:

There’s a bit of feeling out there, good.

Is it all warm feelings of international respect?

Warner 33 from 67, bowled by Ashwin.

Smiffy made 8.

FUCK

Lunch..

2/87

Game on

Ian said:

Lunch..

2/87

Game on

We have some more batting depth yet.

50 up for Renshaw.

He may be a keeper.

sibeen said:

50 up for Renshaw.

He may be a keeper.

may rather be, a batsman.

The pitch really is a minefield. The second last ball must have moved well over half a metre after hitting the pitch.

sibeen said:

The pitch really is a minefield. The second last ball must have moved well over half a metre after hitting the pitch.

it’s called bounce.

FUCK

sibeen said:

FUCK

He got the taste.

FUCK

Instant Karma is bowling bloody well.

FUCK

Mitch has failed again, it’s a good test match.

Peak Warming Man said:

Mitch has failed again, it’s a good test match.

Which is after all what they are.

Phew

Michael V said:

Phew

There has been a lot of that. Great bowling + shit pitch = brown :)

sibeen said:

Michael V said:

Phew

There has been a lot of that. Great bowling + shit pitch = brown :)

It is clear by what the Indians did that the batsman is the one in question, every time. on this pitch.

FUCK

Oh, he dropped it…silly bunt

LAUGHS

sibeen said:

FUCK

Oh, he dropped it…silly bunt

LAUGHS

that back giggle that you nearly choked on?

50 to S. Marsh.

Good lad.

We are in front

We’re in front

The lead is building, test cricket, you can’t beat it.

Peak Warming Man said:

The lead is building, test cricket, you can’t beat it.

It is always OK when the bowlers can’t get you out… until they do.

Peak Warming Man said:

The lead is building, test cricket, you can’t beat it.

Aye.

Oh dear.

Peak Warming Man said:

The lead is building, test cricket, you can’t beat it.

Now look what you’ve done, you bloody jinxed it!

FUCK

roughbarked said:

Peak Warming Man said:

The lead is building, test cricket, you can’t beat it.

It is always OK when the bowlers can’t get you out… until they do.

if you are thinking backyard cricket,
you are probably way too late to have seen this bloke in his prime.

Bloody test cricket. Who’d watch this shit.

Your blog is very entertaining, thanks

-Peak Warming Man

Naw, thanks Peak Warming Man!

———————————————————————————————————————-

Onya!

:)

What I do is log every delivery like this.
I then print it out and take it down the bus shelter and see if any one wants to go through it with me.

100.3 Umesh Yadav to Mitchell Starc. Length ball, to leg on the front foot defending, to mid on for no runs, fielded by Ashwin.
100.2 OUT! Caught. Umesh Yadav to Shaun Marsh. Length ball, to leg on the front foot working, mis-timed in the air uncontrolled to mid wicket, by Nair.
100.1 Umesh Yadav to Shaun Marsh. Yorker, middle stump on the front foot driving, back to bowler for no runs, fielded by Yadav.
Over 100. 5 runs. Bowler: Ravindra Jadeja. Australia: 220/5 (rr 2.20)
99.6 Ravindra Jadeja to Shaun Marsh. Stock length ball, outside off stump on the front foot working, to long on for 1 run, fielded by Pujara.
99.5 Ravindra Jadeja to Matthew Wade. Stock length ball, off stump on the front foot working, to deep backward square leg for 1 run, fielded by Sharma.
99.4 Ravindra Jadeja to Shaun Marsh. Stock length ball, outside off stump on the front foot defending, to cover for 1 run.
99.3 Ravindra Jadeja to Matthew Wade. Stock length ball, to leg on the front foot working, to deep backward square leg for 1 run, fielded by Sharma.

sibeen said:

Bloody test cricket. Who’d watch this shit.

I would, if I could get it on free-to-air TV.

I’m listening to the stop-start ABC coverage on the internet (broadcast from computer and played through the stereo). And, reading the ABC blog.

Michael V said:

Your blog is very entertaining, thanks

-Peak Warming Man

Naw, thanks Peak Warming Man!

———————————————————————————————————————-

Onya!

:)

Hehe, you looking at their blog too, it’s good.

Peak Warming Man said:

What I do is log every delivery like this.
I then print it out and take it down the bus shelter and see if any one wants to go through it with me.

100.3 Umesh Yadav to Mitchell Starc. Length ball, to leg on the front foot defending, to mid on for no runs, fielded by Ashwin.
100.2 OUT! Caught. Umesh Yadav to Shaun Marsh. Length ball, to leg on the front foot working, mis-timed in the air uncontrolled to mid wicket, by Nair.
100.1 Umesh Yadav to Shaun Marsh. Yorker, middle stump on the front foot driving, back to bowler for no runs, fielded by Yadav.
Over 100. 5 runs. Bowler: Ravindra Jadeja. Australia: 220/5 (rr 2.20)
99.6 Ravindra Jadeja to Shaun Marsh. Stock length ball, outside off stump on the front foot working, to long on for 1 run, fielded by Pujara.
99.5 Ravindra Jadeja to Matthew Wade. Stock length ball, off stump on the front foot working, to deep backward square leg for 1 run, fielded by Sharma.
99.4 Ravindra Jadeja to Shaun Marsh. Stock length ball, outside off stump on the front foot defending, to cover for 1 run.
99.3 Ravindra Jadeja to Matthew Wade. Stock length ball, to leg on the front foot working, to deep backward square leg for 1 run, fielded by Sharma.

Heh.

:)

knocks off bails

Stumps gentlemen.

lead of 48 with only 4 wickets in hand.

need to eek out a lead of 100 somehow

Yes. Can’t bank on making a stack in the last innings.

party_pants said:

lead of 48 with only 4 wickets in hand.

need to eek out a lead of 100 somehow

You just never know what Starc will get up to…

About an hour until the start of the third day’s play. Australia in front by a nose. Let’s hope they can build on their lead substantially.

:)

Michael V said:

About an hour until the start of the third day’s play. Australia in front by a nose. Let’s hope they can build on their lead substantially.

:)

given the way the pitch is deteriorating I’d say anything north of a 100 run first innings lead may be bridge too far for India… But let’s hope that Wade can actually earn his “wicket keeper batsman” stripes today…

As the commentators were saying yesterday, Starc will be there for a good time not necessarily a long time.

…and we are off.

FUCK

maybe

NOT OUT

I love DRS.

FUCK

sibeen said:

NOT OUT

I love DRS.

Virat, I think sibeen would like his handle back

steady… steady…

FUCK for Wade and…

FUCK for Lyon

Jadeja on a hat-trick

diddly-squat said:

FUCK for Wade and…

FUCK for Lyon

+1

technical difficulties

sibeen said:

diddly-squat said:

FUCK for Wade and…

FUCK for Lyon

+1

technical difficulties

I must say I did wait for you…

I think Josh will be along shortly…

FUCK

All out, 87 in front.

sibeen said:

FUCK

All out, 87 in front.

Well that didn’t take long.

Great position for Australia… I hope we don’t throw it away from here…

Peak Warming Man said:

I saw where you got that.

Oh, nice.

:)

Sibeen?

Currently: India – 1/41.

FUCK OFF

Bit late, my friend.

Michael V said:

Bit late, my friend.

FUCK OFF

:)

sibeen said:

Michael V said:

Bit late, my friend.

FUCK OFF

:)

Oh, OK, I will.

;)

50 for Rahul. Pretty bloody quick…

FUCK OFF

Fuck Off Kohli 15

2/112

3 fer

:)

Be very worried India

Well done Josh.

we need a clatter of wickets soonish please….

party_pants said:

we need a clatter of wickets soonish please….

Yes, this wont do, wont do at all.

Peak Warming Man said:

party_pants said:

we need a clatter of wickets soonish please….

Yes, this wont do, wont do at all.

the game of cricket, funny as it may be, is no laughing matter.

Top 10 List of the World’s Most Popular Sports
Estimated Fans

1. Soccer / Association Football 3.5 Billion
2. Cricket 2.5 Billion
3. Field Hockey 2 Billion
4. Tennis 1 Billion

Bogsnorkler said:

Peak Warming Man said:

party_pants said:

we need a clatter of wickets soonish please….

Yes, this wont do, wont do at all.

the game of cricket, funny as it may be, is no laughing matter.

You are on form, Boris.

Peak Warming Man said:

Top 10 List of the World’s Most Popular Sports
Estimated Fans

1. Soccer / Association Football 3.5 Billion
2. Cricket 2.5 Billion
3. Field Hockey 2 Billion
4. Tennis 1 Billion

I like a bit of it but can’t watch tennis for too long. Can watch all the others but really only understand the cricket.

Peak Warming Man said:

Top 10 List of the World’s Most Popular Sports
Estimated Fans

2. Cricket 2.5 Billion

Seems too high.

India would be around 1 billion, but I would not have thought all the rest of the cricket playing nations combined would be enough even to double it.

party_pants said:

we need a clatter of wickets soonish please….

Yes, yes we do.

Why is Smith not bowling himself, or exchange Handscombe for Wade and get Wade to try his arm?

Michael V said:

party_pants said:

we need a clatter of wickets soonish please….

Yes, yes we do.

Why is Smith not bowling himself, or exchange Handscombe for Wade and get Wade to try his arm?

Who knows. As Boris said, it is a funny game.

knocks bails off

Stumps gentlemen.

Stumps.

good last session for India, I guess.

At stumps: India 4-213 (Rahane 40*, Pujara 78*) – lead Australia by 126.

party_pants said:

good last session for India, I guess.

Sounds like it.

You do know our batting is going to collapse like a hose of cards.

Hose?

What have socks and stockings got to do with it?

Michael V said:

Hose?

What have socks and stockings got to do with it?

U can’t handle the truth.

sibeen said:

You do know our batting is going to collapse like a hose of cards.

this is what I’m afraid off. Can’t see Aus chasing more that 200

We’re on.

BUGGER

FUCK OFF

Oh good.

Thank you Mr M. Starc.

stoic review by Smith The Unworthy

FUCK OFF

Stark!!!

Mr Starc on a hat trick. Well done!

Michael V said:

Oh good.

Thank you Mr M. Starc.

Better thank him again :)

sibeen said:

Michael V said:

Oh good.

Thank you Mr M. Starc.

Better thank him again :)

Thank you again Mr M Starc.

Oh bugger.

I was hoping for a hat trick…

Hazelwood!!!

FUCK OFF

Thank you Josh!

:)

Michael V said:

Thank you Josh!

:)

Wickets are tumbling like a pollies promises.

That’s good. The two real danger men are now gone.

FUCK OFF

Thank you again Josh.

FUCK OFF

Crickey!!!

Well, well, well.

:)

FUCK OFF

188 to win.

188 ro win, it aint going to be easy.

Arthur Mailey wrote a book called Ten For Sixty Six And All That, apparently.

there will be a result here… exciting times…

Renshaw FUCK 5

Peak Warming Man said:

Arthur Mailey wrote a book called Ten For Sixty Six And All That, apparently.

Yeah, I know it.. was floating around home when I was young.

.

This thread makes very strange reading in isolation.

If the partnerships average 22 and there are nine of them we’d get…
22 × 9………………….nine twos are 18…………………….carry the one………………..
we’d get 198, that’s heaps.

Peak Warming Man said:

If the partnerships average 22 and there are nine of them we’d get…
22 × 9………………….nine twos are 18…………………….carry the one………………..
we’d get 198, that’s heaps.

Yep.. she’ll be right

diddly-squat said:

there will be a result here… exciting times…

We’re still talking about the cricket aren’t we?

runs away

FUCK

FUCK

sibeen said:

FUCK

FiretrUCKs are everywhere at this time of year.

Marsh the Magnificent, gone.

Michael V said:

Marsh the Magnificent, gone. SAD.

fixed

He’d still be there if they had reviewed.

Yes sir we got trouble.
Mitch Mars needs to attack, he wont last long batting conventionally.

Peak Warming Man said:

Yes sir we got trouble.
Mitch Mars needs to attack, he wont last long batting conventionally.

It could be his day, the young space cadet.

3 down fer 2

FUCK

FUCK

FUCK

Hanscomb has to go for it, the bowling is too good for the tail.

Peak Warming Man said:

Hanscomb has to go for it, the bowling is too good for the tail.

Hazelwood can always hold up an end..

It’s a funny old game.

The bridge is a long way off.

Peak Warming Man said:

The bridge is a long way off.

A long long way away.

fk

Thank you linesmen thank you ball boys.

Ian said:

Peak Warming Man said:

Yes sir we got trouble.
Mitch Mars needs to attack, he wont last long batting conventionally.

It could be his day, the young space cadet.

THey had 87 to win and four wickets to play it with when I last looked. Latest anyone?

The thing that shits me is that the people who make money out of test cricket keep telling the lie that test cricket needs to change., have more night games they say, change the foremast to 4 days they say, have swimming pools for the kiddies they say, more razzle dazzle they say.
They are spruiking bullshit and jabbawocky, the reality is test cricket is as healthy as ever, they can get fucked and burnt.

It’s an amazing game.

Sibeen’s probably in intensive care.

dv said:

It’s an amazing game.

and funny. very funny.

Bogsnorkler said:

dv said:

It’s an amazing game.

and funny. very funny.

You’re funny.

Ian said:

Bogsnorkler said:

dv said:

It’s an amazing game.

and funny. very funny.

You’re funny.

More strange than funny.

Ian said:

Bogsnorkler said:

dv said:

It’s an amazing game.

and funny. very funny.

You’re funny.

How fucking weird is it for an offie to get 8 wickets in the first innings and then nothing in the second?

• How fucking weird is it for an offie to get 8 wickets in the first innings and then nothing in the second?

Match fixing…

furious said:

• How fucking weird is it for an offie to get 8 wickets in the first innings and then nothing in the second?

Match fixing…

I wonder if that’s how Trump won. Clinton put a few lazy billion on DJT and then instructed her acolytes to vote for him.

dv said:

Ian said:

Bogsnorkler said:

and funny. very funny.

You’re funny.

How fucking weird is it for an offie to get 8 wickets in the first innings and then nothing in the second?

It’s fixed to keep the public coming.

dv said:

Ian said:

Bogsnorkler said:

and funny. very funny.

You’re funny.

How fucking weird is it for an offie to get 8 wickets in the first innings and then nothing in the second?

it’s funny weird, that’s for sure.

Oh well, we’ve got a live series.

And there are about a billion happy Indians.

Bogsnorkler said:

dv said:

Ian said:

You’re funny.

How fucking weird is it for an offie to get 8 wickets in the first innings and then nothing in the second?

it’s funny weird, that’s for sure.

You’re not doing it right Boris.

• And there are about a billion happy Indians.

Might call IT support tomorrow and ask them about it…

sorry made an arse of myself

Bogsnorkler said:

sorry made an arse of myself

Quite deliberately, I reckon.

Bad form boris.. Attention seeking is something you need to seek help about.