Few things
Snoring probably serves the purpose of masking external noises, and desensitizes the snorer (incidently, my wife finds it reassuring, at a distance with a wall between us, it signals i’m not dead and available to fight intruders, if needed – think ancestral environment).
People in groups, and probably other animals, do a brief wakening and listen (and look i’d guess sometimes) to check things (where they are, babies present and breathing, fires still alight etc), this task can be loosely shared and alternated.
If you’re awake and nudged her then you’re the one on duty at that time, no need for her to be.
The throat muscle relaxation, or whatever it is, is involuntary, I can have it when awake when very tired (perhaps unwell), more so since I had a terrible grief seven years ago, and there’s another thing I do too being a rapid shallow wavering of inhalation/exhalation, or it would be if it wasn’t so shallow.
For a snorer the throat relaxation and sound can be as normal as breathing, and it is breathing.
Humans sleep because they are diurnal, so not so tired while wakeful, and we tend to sleep at the same time so as not to wake each other with activity. Sleeping so close to each other probably came with modern times and elevated beds (note something contradictory of effort once too near). To some extent it’s the modern bed and sleeping arrangement that helps pathologize snoring. Related, the living under a single roof has unintended difficulties too (of modern living).